The American Peasant

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The American Peasant
The American Peasant
Board Feet BS

Board Feet BS

How not to buy wood.

Christopher Schwarz's avatar
Christopher Schwarz
Feb 04, 2024
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The American Peasant
The American Peasant
Board Feet BS
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“Welcome to the Cambium Café! May I take your order?”

“Yes, I’d like 2.3125 pounds of sustenance.”

“Oooo. Excellent choice sir. And how would you like that sustenance?”

“Let’s see. I’d like 8 ounces of grilled protein, 17 ounces of starch, fried. And 12 ounces of steamed vegetable matter.”

“You got it.”

That’s not how we order food. And it’s not how I buy wood.

I can honestly say, with my hand on my duodenum, that I have never walked into a lumberyard and said: “I would like 19.17 board feet of cherry. Ope, I almost forgot to allow for 20 percent waste. So I’ll actually need 23.004 board feet.”

When I make chairs or one-off pieces, I pick every stick of wood. I don’t think about board feet until the clerk rings up my order (and I Kegel just a little to ensure I don’t crap myself).

So when people ask: “How many board feet do I need to build a stick chair?” I don’t have a good answer. You can order 500 board feet of lumber and manage to get only one chair out of that pile of wood because the gr…

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